Self-care starts with others

Why Thinking in Networks Is Essential for Resilient Healthcare

Self-care. Self-management. Positive health.

These are concepts that are now firmly embedded in policy and practice within the health care and social services sectors.
But how “self” is self-care, really? And who’s in charge when someone isn’t quite sure what to do?

What is often overlooked is the role of our social network: family, neighbors, friends, and coworkers—the people around us. Especially in vulnerable situations, their support proves to be crucial for recovery, well-being, and sticking with healthy choices.

The Power of Social Support

Research consistently shows that social support protects against stress, depression, and anxiety. It is not only actual help that matters, but above all, perceived support —the idea that someone is there for you—that makes the difference (the mediating role of perceived support, E.F. Acoba (2024)).

Simply mapping out your network helps: having a clear overview brings peace of mind. You can see who your “supporters” are—and that gives you resilience.

A study of older adults shows that people with strong social support are less likely to develop symptoms of depression when they have physical health problems. Their social network acts as a buffer—not only mentally, but also physically. ​PMC 

A real-life example: knowing who you can count on

Still, we’re often asked: “Why should I map out my social network? I don’t have a problem, do I?”
And let’s be honest: many people wait to take action until it’s really necessary.

But I believe you shouldn’t wait until something goes wrong to map out your network.
You do it as a form of self-care and as a precaution. That way, when the time comes, you’ll know who you can count on.

A real-world example:

During the European PATH project (2020–2023), I worked alongside Saskia (not her real name). As a project staff member, she naturally tried out the “ MLM-Tool ” at the start of the project. She soon noticed how consciously she began to observe the people around her. She explained how it had subtly but significantly changed the way she interacted with neighbors and friends, for example.

Not long after, her partner became seriously ill. During that difficult time, the MLM Card she had created earlier proved to be invaluable. She knew who to call, who could help her with specific issues, and where she could unburden her heart.
She said, “I felt surrounded and supported. That made it all a little easier.”

Unfortunately, just as her partner had recovered, another blow struck: Saskia herself was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer. Until her death, she continued to emphasize how much support she had received thanks to her conscious awareness of her network.
“I gave myself this advantage without knowing I would need it,” she said.

Saskia is a constant source of inspiration to me. And to be honest: on difficult days, when I’m not sure whether I should write or speak about the “ MLM-Tool ” again, I think of her.
She reminds me why I do this work—and why I continue to believe in the power of networked thinking and the MLM-Tool as a wonderful tool.

Self-care is rarely a solo endeavor

Social support also appears to be crucial for people with chronic conditions. A study of people with heart failure shows that those who receive emotional and informational support exhibit better self-care behaviors. Support boosts self-confidence and reduces feelings of gloom—both of which are key to effective self-care.

Research also shows that interventions focused on increasing perceived support strengthen mental health and improve self-care abilities. In short: social support is a fundamental part of care—and therefore also of self-care. PubMed

What does this mean for professionals?

For professionals in health care and social services, this means: look beyond the individual client. Take the client’s network into account—not just when things go wrong, but from the very beginning.

With the “ MLM-tool ” (My Life With...?), your client can clearly map out his or her social network in 5 simple steps. The “ MLM-Tool ” encourages reflection, fosters awareness, and brings to light relationships that are often taken for granted.

And—just as important—it makes them something we can talk about.

A client who knows who his or her supporters are not only feels stronger—he or she is stronger.

Conclusion: It works when we work together

Self-care isn't a solo effort. It's a collaborative effort. By actively involving the social network, we work together to bring about lasting change—for the client and for you as a professional.

Curious about the “ MLM-tool ”?
See how you can apply it in your professional practice: www.mlm-tool.nl
Or better yet: become MLM-coach and systematically put your clients’ network on the map.